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The Confident Mother

Helping ambitious women in technology fully unlock their leadership potential

15th October 2015

What’s stopping you today?

What’s stopping you today from taking action? For me, the theme for October is ACTION. It’s always action.

During the summer holidays, life and business may slow down a little while the children are on school holidays. September is often a month of transition as we adjust to new routines, new schools or in my case new clients.

October is a month of action

Now it’s October and we have three months left before the end of the year. Three months to complete your 2015 goals.

Earlier this month, I was inspired and moved to tears to see Nadiya Hussain in the Great British Bake Off Final. Are you GBBO fans? If you watched the series, you will have seen Nadiya grow in confidence. From finishing last in the first technical challenge to first in the last technical challenge, her self-belief has flourished.

Nadiya is proof that you CAN do anything you believe you can do. At the end of the final bake-off, she said “I’m never going to say ‘I can’t do it’” and that never again would she put boundaries in her way. She now believes “I can, I am, and I WILL”.

What about you? What’s stopping you from taking action? What do you allow to get in the way?

Many mums end up stuck in jobs (part-time or full-time) that we don’t enjoy. For some it’s difficult to find work that fits the childcare available. For others, looking for a new job or even career seems too overwhelming, too much to handle. Some might be yearning for the flexibility and freedom of starting a business but don’t know where or how to get started.

Feel the fear and do it anyway

Often when there are life-changing decisions to be made, we hesitate. Perhaps it’s fear, lack of confidence, feeling overwhelmed, uncertainty or we just don’t know how to get started. Maybe it’s procrastination (and there’s a reason that we procrastinate).  If this is you, you might enjoy this book Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers. 

When I started swimming lessons a couple of weeks ago, I would have loved an excuse to not go to that first lesson. The pool is literally five minutes walk from my house. As I walked there, I kept repeating to myself “feel the fear and do it anyway”. I am not a confident swimmer but I know that I need to feel more confident in the water; I feel like I owe it to my children but also to myself. I hadn’t been swimming for three years – partly because of a cycling accident in which I broke my shoulder, but partly because I was scared. As I walked out from the changing room to poolside, I was shaking. I could feel the fear and I did it anyway.  You can too.

How to get started to take action

To get started, think about first things first, and start with small steps:

  • Identify WHO you are i.e. your strengths and your resources.
  • List WHAT you are i.e. your experience, your skills, your formal learning, your informal learning.
  • Get clarity on what is IMPORTANT to you? is it flexibility? creativity? stability? autonomy? loyalty?
  • Recognise what you WANT and LOVE to do (which is often different from what you ‘should’ do)
  • Understand the GAP between what you have now and what you want instead.
  • Create your action plan and break it into smaller steps.
  • Find support and accountability – your partner, a friend, a work colleague – tell them what you are going to do and very importantly when.

More than anything notice when you say “I can’t” or “I’m not good enough” or “I shouldn’t”. Reframe those thoughts and instead tell yourself “I can, I am and I will”. Read more about positive thinking here.

Share your thoughts below of what you will do today now that you know how to start to take action.  After all, what’s stopping you now?

Is a lack of confidence getting in your way? Check out my free online classes on the Events page.

Article by Sherry Bevan / confident mother, The Confident Mother, Working mums Leave a Comment

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